Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Randomize
