I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
