I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
That accounts for only three of the penises
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
Randomize
