Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
