plz talk dirty to me
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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