you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
this boner is exhausting
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
My vagina is officially offended.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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