is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
