Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
tell your sister to shave her snatch
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Randomize