Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
