entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize
