I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Randomize
