I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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