I must be too annoying 4 u.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
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