okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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