Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
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