i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
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