can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
