IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize
