We won't sleep together?
dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
Randomize
