i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Randomize
