you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
