Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize
