Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
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