trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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