ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
