I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
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