This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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