we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Randomize
