You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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