he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
