I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
