Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize
