white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize