I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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