She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
50% drunk capacity currently
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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