btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Randomize
