Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Everything about him screamed your future.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Randomize
