You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
