He is an equal opportunity slut.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
