His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
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