So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
