"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Randomize
