I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
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