sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
