my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
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