so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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