I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
