if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Randomize
