And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
