I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
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