I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
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