So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
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